Currently, like right at this moment as I am typing this blog for you all, I feel drained. But I know if I allow this feeling to resonate, I’ll become unproductive. I recently got turned down for a job, I sooooo badly wanted. It wasn’t about earning money, I was just eager to start and develop my career doing something I’m passionate about in an industry that is knowingly hard to break into.
Being unsuccessful was a huge knock back for my confidence. I think a lot of us believe that working towards an end result is supposed to be a relatively straight forward journey. When things aren’t going to plan and you find yourself going in a different direction and undoubtedly coming across on hurdles on the go, we often become discouraged and deterred.
I doubt I’m the only person in my 20s that feel as though they are supposed to have their whole life together. The reality is, most of us are not where I want to be and are struggling to get there.”
Its clear there is a huge pressure on young people to be successful, financially stable and living their “best life” and social media plays a huge part in this. With everything being brought to you live and direct, image and life style show status and no one wants to be ranked bottom. Obviously this is not the case for everyone but its hard not to get sucked in and compare yourselves to others when its all that you are surrounded by. The vloggers, the rappers, Influencers, footballers, comedians, a lot of whom portray a lifestyle of Private events, freebies and paid sponsored posts. What often we dont see, is the hard work and graft that goes behind this seemingly relaxed and easy lifestyle. But a lot of us are brain washed with the fantasy of making money off social media as a “Get rich quick” scheme. Lol I missed out the “or die trying” part of the famous (or should I say infamous) slogan from 50 cent because for me to do anything to get rich comes with sacrifice. And God forbid you loose who you truly are for the sake of others.
I recently posted a picture on Instagram and as I posted it, I asked my cousin his opinion to which he jokingly replied “facade”. Taken a back, I was quite defensive and felt the need to justify myself and my role as a blogger. To which he replied “social media is a facade, everyone does it. people only show you what they want you to see.”
This was something I definitely was already aware of but for some reason I felt the need to define the word facade and do a little self evaluation.
The English dictionary defines the word facade as “a deceptive outwards appearance”. I studied the picture I posted, despite my work as blogger and social influencer, I thought about the efforts I went to, to achieve the “perfect”. First of all of all before I posted one, I probably took a couple 100, (shout out to my BBFs for their patience). And of course every element, EVERY. In this picture has to be on point. Most importantly the lighting, then theres the background/setting and the need for it to be appealing and of course we cant forget personal appearance. Hair needs to be on point, make-up fleeky, cute outfit on check (dont forget to tag brands), and finally equally as important make sure you hide that broken nail. OH NO you thought that was it? beforeeeeeeee you post, its vital lol to check instagrams analytic to ensure your posting at the right time when your audience is the most active to accumulate the most likes. Although the picture depicts someone who seemingly looks confident, stylish, sexy, laid back, blessed. What my followers dont know is that I had a break down last week, I’m concious of beauty standards, I held my breath for a flatter stomach and to extenuate my curves (you learn all the tricks in the book with practise) NOT THAT IM CONDONING THIS!! and I told my bestie I looked ugly before she finally convinced me it was cute. Ha how ironic. There you go, I said it. So really and truly I suppose my cousin was right the photo was a facade.
As I write this openly and embarrassingly tell you the truth and effort that goes behind my instagram photos. I do feel a sense of relief and have acknowledged that I can change my way of thinking and the reasons behind the choices I make when it comes to how I want my followers to see me.
The power and influence of social media suggests that to be successful is to have money. If you have no money and your not successful, you aren’t poppin’. But success is whatever you make it.
And if your in your 20s or early teens and feel as though your falling behind. YOUR NOT ALONE (Check image on the right if you don’t believe me).
If you stop watching what is around you then you wont see a race. And you have a lot of time to get YOUR life together, the human life expectancy is up to 70 years old. Do I really have to say anything more?
Your 20s are supposed to be one of the best times in your life.
A time for drunken mistakes, heartbreaks, silly part time jobs and 2am study groups. Everyday is a growing experience and you literally learn on the go.
Don’t get me wrong. This is not an excuse for laziness. Everyone should be on a journey working towards something but the truth is; life is not straight forward. No one knows indefinitely what’s going to happen tomorrow or the day after. So have a little fun whilst working your butt off.
It’s a fact that during the times when we lose a little sense of direction, that the issues that we are facing can strengthen, motivate and prepare us for what’s coming.
So don’t be deterred. You are running your own race, on your own track and at your own pace.
And if I don’t take my own advice, ill eat my foot.
Lots of love,